The Grammar Slam: The Oxford Comma.

Maybe you have heard of it; the elusive and legendary comma that has always been classified as 'optional.'  In a list, the Oxford comma, or serial comma, precedes the coordinating conjunction (usually and or or), effectively separating the final two items in a list.

No doubt you have been programmed, like all the mindless grammar robots turned out by the school systems in this great nation, to disregard this last comma.  However, the Oxford comma is imperative to correctly interpreting the meaning of sentences.

If the last two objects in a list are unrelated -- like genocide and Portugal -- then the Oxford comma proves less vital.  *I'm only afraid of breakfast nooks, genocide and Portugal.*  With or without the comma, the meaning is unchanged because genocide and Portugal are obviously two separate fears.  The comma does become important, however, when the two items are somewhat related and could be considered an appositive.  Let's say I have disdain for Kim Jong-il and Hillary Clinton.  *I have nothing but the utmost contempt for my parents, Kim Jong-il and Hillary Clinton.*  Are my parents Kim Jong-il and Hillary Rodham Clinton?  Of course not, that would effectively make me the anti-Christ, but it's still confusing.

Try to decipher these sentences.  Do they need an Oxford comma or are they appositives?    

• My brother had a great time at the party with his new friends, a race horse and a dwarf.
• Charlie loves his wife, a school teacher and a poet.
• I absolutely will not involve myself with these condiments, nutmeg and convicted murderers.
• I wish I had the time to do what I love, get drunk and eat bacon.
• There are many things on this earth we should be thankful for, some we should condemn and others forget.  
• It would be nice if I had more time for my dogs, Hamlet and Goose.  

Take time for the Oxford comma; it could change your world, Wisconsin and Southern France.

Jamie Michelle